"semakin dekat loh kenal sama orang, semakin cepat loh sakit hati"
Ipuy, Lovely Man. 2011
There you go, one of my biggest fears meeting new people. luls
It's true that I've been avoiding. Some might noticed, some might not. I did not completely shut people out, I just want to be given some space for myself (like I never get that. haha but I love my "me time" so much, I crave for it sometimes). I haven't met people who I call my closest for almost two months now.
That two months period, I've used it wisely (hopefully), I spent most of the time with my family. My parents especially. Had dinner with my close family on my birthday, watched movie (my oh my, Abah loves being in the cinema. He might forgot he loved movies back then and used to take Mummy on a movie date!), we even bowl together, we had our mini road trip to Kudat, I went to my so called second home, SouKor (more on that on different post, maybe), oh yes, we did a lot of things (that includes doing nothing at home)
Honestly, after spending those precious time with my family, I asked myself, "Do you really need friends in your life?" I came up with this question after thinking about what happened to me this year. I reminiscence all the events this year, all my childish decisions and acts, the reactions I got from people around me, everything -- it came back as I keep blaming myself. Thinking it's all my fault -- for letting people came into my life and actually believe we're going to be okay for a long, long time. Deep down, I was disappointed. Or still am.
But still, not meeting my closest is not the real me either. There were always extra time for them. (and money, of course. not always but we go dutch all the time. luls). Therefore, I'm slowly becoming myself again, InsyaAllah.
A lot of "me time" until I got this crazy, cheezy idea to write a short story. But I'm too lazy, so yeah. I really, really, really miss having a laptop.
That two months period, I've used it wisely (hopefully), I spent most of the time with my family. My parents especially. Had dinner with my close family on my birthday, watched movie (my oh my, Abah loves being in the cinema. He might forgot he loved movies back then and used to take Mummy on a movie date!), we even bowl together, we had our mini road trip to Kudat, I went to my so called second home, SouKor (more on that on different post, maybe), oh yes, we did a lot of things (that includes doing nothing at home)
Honestly, after spending those precious time with my family, I asked myself, "Do you really need friends in your life?" I came up with this question after thinking about what happened to me this year. I reminiscence all the events this year, all my childish decisions and acts, the reactions I got from people around me, everything -- it came back as I keep blaming myself. Thinking it's all my fault -- for letting people came into my life and actually believe we're going to be okay for a long, long time. Deep down, I was disappointed. Or still am.
But still, not meeting my closest is not the real me either. There were always extra time for them. (and money, of course. not always but we go dutch all the time. luls). Therefore, I'm slowly becoming myself again, InsyaAllah.
A lot of "me time" until I got this crazy, cheezy idea to write a short story. But I'm too lazy, so yeah. I really, really, really miss having a laptop.